"The Night Before Christmas" in Legalize

Check out Patrick Lamb's post "Good Writing: What Lawyer's Do To Christmas" on his blog In Search of Perfect Client Service. The story begins:

Whereas, on or about the night prior to Christmas, there did occur at a certain improved piece of real property (hereinafter "the House") a general lackof stirring by all creatures therein, including, but not limited to a mouse.

And Whereas, a variety of foot apparel, e.g., stocking, socks, etc., had been affixed by and around the chimney in said House in the hope and/or belief that St. Nick a/k/a/ St. Nicholas a/k/a/ Santa Claus (hereinafter "Claus") would arrive at some time thereafter.